Few months ago a film called Saas Bahu Aur Sen Sex hit the screens and disappeared before you could finish saying its title. The film sought to show the life of contemporary Indian middle class, their dreams, aspirations and pitfalls.
This week's release EMI also has the urban Indian middle class as its protagonist. But unlike Saas Bahu Aur Sen Sex, the film focuses on a different temptress called the Equitable Monthly Instalments or EMI.
Despite being two very different films targeted at very different sets of audiences, it is spooky to see how similar the flaws are. Both films for instance lack a coherent storyline. They also have very weak characters and songs in both the movies could well be done away with. What's more, while Saas Bahu Aur Sen Sex has wasted a talented actor, Farooque Shaikh, this one totally wastes Sanjay Dutt.
Now the complete title of EMI is EMI – Liya Hai to Chukana Padega. It draws its inspiration from real life incidents of goons posing as loan recovery agents and harassing defaulters till they either pay up or end their lives.
Prerna (Urmila Matondkar) is one such woman whose husband has chosen the latter option and left his wife and daughter in the lurch. The pretty and young housewife is left dealing with the police to prove that her husband died under mysterious circumstances just so that she can lay claim to his insurance money.
Ryan (Arjun Rampal) is a resident DJ of a popular club and a Casanova who, as a character in the film points out, 'has credit cards of all colours'. He sports an Ed Hardy shirt and doesn't think twice before swiping the card to buy his live-in partner Nancy (Malaika Arora Khan) an expensive Tag Heuer watch.
Anil (Ashish Chowdhry) is a sex addict who after much consideration has finally decided to tie the knot and borrows heavily before taking the plunge. But barely a year later he finds himself seeking a divorce and is on the brink of insanity, as the 'Easy Monthly Instalments' don't get repaid as he had planned.
Chandrakant (Kulbhushan Karbanda) has given in to his emotions and borrowed money to fulfil his son's dreams of going abroad for further studies. But sure enough, the wastrel returns home with yet another feather-brained idea for his future leaving his father no options but to start working all over again.
Now all these individual stories come together at the office of Goodluck Recovery Agency whose big boss is one Sattar Bhai (Sanjay Dutt). Sattar is a no-nonsense chap who hammers the living daylights out of the people who owe money to banks.
While the first half of the film largely drags and you try really hard not to sleep, it is the post-intermission part that actually shows signs of being something close to interesting. Sattar bhai, an aspiring politician, has a change of heart
He decides – quite like Munnabhai – to counsel these people in need and understand their problems rather than just wield the hockey stick. And yet again like Munna, Sattar too falls for a damsel and goes all out to help her.
It is this innocence that actually endears you to Sattar the character and Dutt the actor, who pretty much holds the film together. But having seen him do the very same thing in the two Munnabhai films, it comes across as rather repetitive and frankly quite boring.
However it must be confessed, Dutt manages to do a brilliant job out of his limited screen time. The part where he pulls a fast one on Ryan who is teaching him table etiquettes is quite funny.
There's another scene, which many of us who will empathise with. The bank's chairman calls Sattar for a meeting and asks him to soften his ways. At this point Sattar, slightly irritated, shoots back: "Aap mujhe paise dete ho… woh bhi cheque se… aur TDS kaat ke." (You pay me to do this job… by cheque and to top it deduct tax!)
It's not like there aren't great moments in this film. Indeed, some of the lines are really quite funny. Besides the one above, there's another towards the end of the film where on a date Urmila – out of habit – calls him Sattar Bhai. Our Charlie who is besotted by her almost goes down on his knees and says, "Bhai mat bulana!" But these moments and lines are too far and few in-between.
Besides the Munnabhai hangover, the film also suffers from a terrible flaw – that of far too many songs. There are two picturised on Malaika Arora Khan who despite having a great body looks haggard to say the least. And we aren't even mentioning Arjun's wannabe John Travolta act in one of them.
But Malaika is not alone. Ashish Chowdhry and Urmila Matondkar also look terrible in the film. It's one thing Ashish plays someone who makes you want to slap him across the face. But little can be said about his comic timing and acting.
Ditto for Urmila who seems to have exactly those seven and a half practiced expressions, which she's used right from Rangeela to Karzzzz and now in EMI. Her character is so loosely sketched, it makes her look like a gold digging b***h when the film's posters tell you she's some damsel in distress.
Verdict: Unless the makers offer you tickets on instalments and don't send recovery agents after you, give this one a pass.