Moon Moon Sen on her mystical mother Suchitra Sen

 

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align="right"/> Moon Moon Sen talks about her mother, the legendary actress Suchitra Sen. Moon Moon Sen on her mystical mother Suchitra Sen

 

 

"She was so loved by everyone...It's hard to imagine she is gone. She was my entire universe.

 

Beautiful memories seem so painful at the moment. I think everyone's mom is very special. But

 

she was special to not just me but all of Bengal, and beyond. I can't think straight right

 

now...But yes, I'll tell you whatever I remember right now...What was she like? She was very

 

undemanding as a person. She was the closest to me. But she knew I had my life to lead and came

 

to terms with that. She liked being alone. But it's not that she didn't like meeting people. She

 

liked meeting interesting people.

 

As a child I remember her always working. I was put in boarding school in Darjeeling and then in

 

England. It was a big joy and privilege for me to come back home for every holiday...thrice a

 

year to spend time with her. Every time I was home I realized how special she was. When I left

 

to go back to boarding school in Darjeeling and later in Surrey she'd cry more than I did. I was

 

very spoilt and pampered. Later when I was studying in Kolkata even when she was at work she

 

would ring up twice a day to find out about me, my meals etc...As I grew older I realized how

 

special she was. During my vacations she'd bring me down from boarding school in England to any

 

part of India. I remember my father driving me to the Taj hotel from the airport in Mumbai when

 

she was in the city shooting for Aandhi. I had to be content with those three annual

 

visits. After school during college I lived with her in Kolkata. We were very very close. When I

 

got married (quite late) and moved out, it must have been very difficult for her.

 

I looked after her when I was there. My going away must have been very hard for her. But she

 

never expressed her anguish. I have a very kind husband. Every morning I went to see my mother

 

and my husband never minded. My husband has always given me a lot of space.... My mother not

 

only dealt with the film industry on her own terms and also looked after the home and me. She

 

did everything that a man and a woman combined could do in a family. She was both father and

 

mother to me. We slept in the same room, ate together and did everything together. I remember

 

I'd be doing my studies and she would be in the next room just back from her shooting relaxing

 

sipping tea and keeping an eye on me. I knew she was always there for me...I can feel her

 

presence now too.

 

 

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align="right"/> When I was not in boarding school she would make sure she was home when I needed

 

her, although she wouldn't pick me up or drop me to school. She didn't have time for that. We

 

had a nanny for all that. Sometimes she would come to school to pick me up. People would not

 

accost her. They respected her privacy all her life in Kolkata.

 

When did I realize she was an iconic star? As a child I knew her as my mother at home and as the

 

actress in the studio. She started the star-system in Bengal. No one had an aura like hers. But

 

our most fun times were when I was in boarding school in England. Both my parents would come to

 

pick me up and we would drive to Scotland and other destinations. There was no question of her

 

privacy being violated during those precious family holidays in and around England. Even in

 

India everyone respected her need for privacy. But it's a myth that she didn't meet people. She

 

met everyone she had to and was extremely polite and easy-going in her social interaction. Of

 

course she had a fierce temper which my daughters and I have inherited. She was very choosy

 

about her friends and a stickler for punctuality. If anything didn't go well while shooting, my

 

mother would be extremely upset and would make no effort to hide it. That's because she was very

 

particular about the quality of her work.

 

One reason why she quit acting in the 1970s was the kitschy mediocrity that overtook Bengali

 

cinema in the 1970s and 80s. Many of the directors she knew well and felt comfortable working

 

with, passed away. The scripts that were offered to her were awful. Uttam Kumar passed away and

 

she'd say, 'Whom am I going to work with?' Once she left acting she left it behind completely.

 

When I started acting she would hardly ask about the film industry except maybe an odd question

 

about how Gulzar Saab was doing. She was extremely fond of him. Otherwise she was totally out of

 

cinema both Bengali and Hindi. She let her stardom go quite easily.

 

But stardom never let go of her. I remember I was on a flight with Andhra Pradesh's eminent

 

producer D Rama Naidu. He said to me, 'Tell your mother I've a blank cheque waiting for your

 

mother whenever she decides to work with me.' And Salim Khan Saab told me she refused Yash

 

Chopra's Deewaar. After she opted out they changed the whole script. From Ma and Sons it

 

became just sons. ...I think she missed the company of like-minded people. She had me and her

 

aunts, sisters, nieces and very few friends. Initially my mom had 9 sisters. Now it's just 4 who

 

are alive. They were here after mom's passing away.

 

 

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align="right"/>I am more outgoing as a person. But let me tell you, when she was working anyone

 

could approach her. She was there to help quietly. She looked after her makeup man's schooling.

 

She looked out for her entire staff, visited their homes if they were indisposed. Her charitable

 

work was not tom-tommed. She was a very generous soul. She had a great deal of self-respect

 

mixed with a whole lot of humility. But she never allowed outsiders to come close to her. One

 

thing she always taught me was to hold my head high.

 

She taught me so many values that I find so credible now. She followed them herself. When we are

 

younger we want to find out everything on our own. As we grow older we realize our parents were

 

right. She never put any restriction on the way I dressed or behaved. When I joined the Hindi

 

film industry many people smirked about Suchitra Sen's daughter wearing a bathing costume. But

 

my mother always let us swim. And I'd move around the house wearing sun-suits. When I grew older

 

I wore mini-skirts. Not once did she comment on my clothes. She told me, 'You aren't comfortable

 

wearing a Saree? Don't worry about it unless we're going to a Shraddh or something.' It made no

 

difference to me if the Hindi film industry thought I was wild because I wore a swimming suit.

 

Now the Mumbai film industry has grown up a bit. During my days it was different. My behaviour

 

seemed unconventional in Mumbai. I'd keep shuttling between Mumbai and Kolkata trying to keep a

 

balance between my mother and husband in Kolkata and my career in Mumbai. I had this bunch of

 

wickedly fun-loving girlfriends to keep me company in Mumbai and my husband would send his

 

friends over to Mumbai to keep me company.

 

I've been very lucky with my mother and my husband. After a point I stopped working in Mumbai

 

and moved back to Kolkata because I wanted to be with my mother. I felt she was lonely without

 

me. Now I am without her...For her final journey I dressed her up so beautifully. I made sure

 

her face was covered from public view. What a pity that was! Because to the end she was so

 

beautiful. She kept urging me to do a few more films and to write. I suppose now I will write

 

again. Maybe a coffee table book about my mother. You know, I promised her I'd never write about

 

her personal life. Keeping out her personal details it'd be very easy for me to write a coffee

 

table book on my mother. I feel my daughter Raima can take over my mother's histrionic legacy

 

forward and my daughter Riya would take forward my mother's spiritual legacy. During my mother's

 

final days Riya was holding her hand through the pain, giving her strength. My mother used to

 

say Riya had the makings of a great comic actress. Now she's gone leaving behind memories. They

 

would never fade. I am certain of that."

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